Andi’s Journal
August 17, 2010
The psalmist in Psalm 43 is asking God to vindicate him from the ungodly people, from the deceitful and unjust man. But God, that’s me. Deceitful and unjust. And just a plain liar. You are the God I take refuge in, but I know exactly why you forsake me, or rather why I cannot stay in your presence. Here’s what I need: send out your light and your truth. Let them bring me to your holy hill and to your dwelling. Then I will go to the altar of my God, to God my exceeding joy, and I will praise you, O God. But no matter how hard I work, I cannot get there without you. You must prove me wrong, in my doubts, fears, and just plain stupidity. “Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.”
Elisabeth Elliot said, “Someone who is suffering as a result of his or her own foolishness or failure may read these words. These griefs are hard indeed to bear, we feel we might easily have avoided them. We have no one to blame but ourselves, and there isn’t much consolation there. Sometimes we imagine that we must bear this kind of trouble alone, but that is a mistake. The Lamb of God, slain for us, has borne all of our griefs and carried all or our sorrows, no matter what their origin. All grief and sorrow is the result of sin somewhere along the line, but Christ received them willingly. It is nothing but pride that keeps me from asking Him to help me to bear the troubles that are my own fault.”
Oswald Chambers asked, “Have you ever heard the Master say something very difficult to you? If you haven’t I question whether you have ever heard him say anything at all.” That is so me! Surely if it is that difficult, I must have totally misunderstood it! Especially if he asked me to do something that my laziness and embarrassment don’t want me to do, or something that will take me away from something fun, and even sinful. What a word for me.
Sorry for the rambling of my journal. It seemed very appropriate today. 🙂
